His plans, or mine?

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”  Jeremiah 29:11

13 years ago today, I became a mother for the 4th time.  My older children were 5, 3, and 1, and I had been feeling very overwhelmed.  My 3 year-old was especially a challenge – I had never imagined that a little one could be so creative in finding ways to get into trouble!  Throughout my pregnancy, I had been telling the Lord that He had given me more than I could handle.

I still don’t really understand it, but somehow, that 4th child made life easier from the day he was born.  It did help that he was the first child that didn’t have to go back to the hospital to spend time in NICU!  But whatever the reasons, I found myself more relaxed, I laughed more, and I handled motherhood more easily.  Don’t get me wrong – I still had lots of days when I felt overwhelmed, but those days were fewer than before #4 was born.

How many times have I gone back to the lesson that the Lord taught me with that 4th child!  I realized that, rather than giving me more than I could handle, the Lord had given me exactly what I needed.  He saw the big picture, not just the little part that I could see.  Where I was overwhelmed and wondered how I could possibly handle another baby, the Lord knew that I NEEDED that baby.  He knew that what I thought would certainly add to my burden would actually lighten that burden.  It STILL doesn’t make sense to me, but I’m glad that I didn’t insist on having my own way!

Corrie ten Boom used to give the analogy of watching someone making a tapestry – from beneath the cloth.  What looked like tangled threads and splotchy colors was a beautiful picture when viewed from the top.  The tangled threads that I see in my life don’t look much like a work of beauty to me, but the Lord is expertly crafting something of His design.  I can’t wait to get to the other side that so I can see the finished work!  🙂

In the meantime, 13 years after learning a little more about trusting the Lord, I am still very thankful for my 4th child.  And, yes, those who know him would not be surprised to hear that he still makes my life easier in many ways.  Happy Birthday, Son!

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